She's here and we can finally tell you all about her!
Andi Nicole Thompson was born on December 3, 2014 and her adoption was finalized today, December 29. She is officially and legally OURS. Forever.
Let's start with her birth story.
On November 17 Crockett and birth mom arrived in Topeka from Michigan. She stayed with us until my mom, sister, and 2 nephews came into town the following week for Thanksgiving. Once they arrived she was given some peace and a quiet place to sleep at a local hotel. (Would you believe that between 4 adults, 2 toddlers, 2 dogs, & a cat in my tiny house not many people got sound sleep that week?) My sister left the Sunday after Thanksgiving (the 30th) which was the due date. My mom left Dec. 2 hoping to be here in time for the big arrival. Andi had other plans.
We went to the hospital 2 or 3 times thinking it was time and they sent us home super bummed each time. Apparently birth mom needed to feel inches from death before they considered her in active labor. The night of Dec. 2 I took my mom and nephews to the airport in Kansas City (~1.5 hours from our house). On my way home Crockett called me and said, "We are going to the hospital!" I met them there at 8 pm, just in time for the nurse to come in and check birth mom. The last time we were there she was at a 2. (For all you non-labor/delivery goo-roos the goal is a 10.) The nurse checked her and she was still at a 2. :( Total bummer. She sent us home.
Side note: During the last few days of this waiting game I was having EXTREME anxiety. I don't even know what was going on with me. I was nervous, excited, scared, jealous, afraid, and 1,000 other things. My pulse was elevated and I was shaky; I couldn't eat and felt nauseous. I felt like I was losing my mind. I made my sister go see a movie with me just so I could have 2 hours outside my own head. It was Mocking Jay part 1; I didn't have to force her too hard. ;) It never went away until we were home from the hospital with Andi in tow.
Back to the story. So we go home and birth mom is having pretty painful contractions. Crockett went to bed thinking he'd probably have to go to work the next day and I stayed up with birth mom. She took a warm bath. She tried several different positions to get comfy and finally at 4 am she decided she needed to go back to the hospital. I took her and told Crockett I would call if we were admitted. We got to the hospital and it was the same nurse from 8 hours before who checked her and she was at a 3.5! Hooray for progress! She called birth mom's doctor and they decided to admit us. (Before leaving triage birth mom got her IV and y'all... they couldn't get the needle in her arm! They, yes, TWO of them, stood there poking and prodding her arm for like 15 minutes trying to get the IV. I, being the soldier I am, had to walk away before I passed out. I felt pretty terrible about that, but at this point I hadn't slept all night and hadn't eaten for over 8 hours. Not to mention all that weird shaky anxiety stuff. Luckily, when I stepped in the hall to heeve nothing came up. The nurse at the station in the hall probably thought I was the weakest lesbian partner in the world.) Off we went to the huge labor/delivery room. (Seriously, biggest hospital room ever.) Enter Crockett with bags and coffee in hand.
Birth mom was a total champ. She labored to an 8.5 before getting her epidural and then it was only about an hour until Andi arrived. I was able to be right there with her through the whole thing. It was amazing. Crockett sat in the corner of the room waiting for that little girl to make her debut and I got to watch my daughter come into the world at 8:02 am.
Another side note: I handled the epidural. I. Did. NOT. handle the catheter. At all. The nurse told me to go lay down and then had Crockett go get me food. I was teetering a bit. Apparently I was a scary shade of ghost. I had a banana and some milk and rested until it was push time where I resumed my position. :) Thankfully, birth mom was able to rest at this point too when the epidural kicked in. BTW, anyone looking for a dula? Don't call me.
Here's our princess!
Ok, this picture may seem creepy with all the pixelation, but she just has pixlexia, guys! J/k. (Wreck-it Ralph reference) I don't have birth mom's permission to post this so I'm just going to show you this sweet, sweet moment without revealing her. This picture will be in Andi's room as soon as I can get some prints. I love that this is an open adoption and I'm blessed to know and love this woman.
Dad's first time to hold Andi. He is totally in love. <3 p="">3>
As soon as Andi was born consent papers were sent to birth dad and birth mom signed her papers in the hospital the morning after. (Also, at the time of signing her consent she also signed the papers giving Crockett and me legal temporary custody which were immediately taken across the street to the court house and signed by a judge.) Birth mom was recovering in a room across the hall from us. The hospital gave us our own room to stay in with Andi as long as she was there. (Total of 2.5 days)
A couple hours after signing her papers she came to our room and told us that birth dad had texted her and said he wasn't sure he wanted to do an adoption anymore. We thought she was joking.
Immediately we called him and put him on speaker with birth mom, Crockett, and myself in the room. I did most of the talking and just asked him what was going on and tried to understand. He said he would think about it and let us know what he decided.
Crockett and I spent that day in prayer pleading with Jesus for this little girl who we were already so in love with. There were many tears. But I have to say, within hours Crockett and I both felt a very real sense of peace. We had to take the pictures we had posted on Facebook down because birth dad had said the reason he was changing his mind was because he saw a picture of Andi. That day I had people ALL DAY texting and messaging me comfort and prayer. It was truly one of those moments you can look back on and say, "Jesus showed up big." We hadn't told anyone what had happened and people were telling me that God had laid my family on their hearts and they had just felt a sense to pray for us. People I haven't talked to in YEARS. It was a mind blowing day. Within a couple hours of talking to birth dad on the phone Crockett and I were still processing and my friend texted me, "This may seem odd, but Jesus just told me tell you that it's going to be ok."
I lost it. Tears everywhere.
My soul was so cared for by my brothers and sisters in Christ and most importantly by the God of the universe who sees me and my situation and loves me and cares for me and intervenes for me.
We spent the next 3 and a half weeks uncertain of how this would play out, but certain that God is sovereign and through it all he would be glorified. We had a court date set for Dec. 19 to finalize the adoption pending birth dad's consent papers. That day came and went and there were still no papers. He wasn't returning my calls and he told birth mom via text he had no intentions of signing and asked her to come back to Kansas and get Andi and bring her to him in Michigan (he doesn't have transportation himself.)
Because we had legal temporary custody it was actually going to be a little difficult for birth dad to actually come and take Andi. He would have had to come to KS, hire a KS lawyer, and take us to court. We weren't counting on that happening, however, what we were afraid of was him just not signing the papers and making us wait. That would have required us to pay additional fees to both our lawyer and the courts to present our case to a judge and try to get birth dad's parental rights taken away by the judge. There are 5 different qualifications in Kansas for a father's rights to be removed and we had 4 going for us. So eventually it became a matter of time and money to get the adoption finalized, not a question of if. But in the mean time we were advised not to leave the state. It wasn't a court order, but a reccomendation by our lawyer.
Don't tell him, but I wasn't about to miss Andi's first Christmas with our families. :)
We drove 13.5 hours and stayed for 11 days in Texas.
While we were there we got a call from our lawyer... HE HAD RECEIVED BIRTH DAD'S CONSENT!!! We were going to court to finalize the adoption! :D
God is so good.
We got back to Kansas yesterday and we had our day in court this morning.
In the words of Jesus, "It is finished."
4 days old and headed to her 1st Dr.'s apt.
Love this face!!
Daddy put the play mat together and as soon as he was done she was asleep.
At the Dr. in her cloth diaper.
View we have on our "nanny cam" in her room.
|We loaded up the truck bed and our little family of 6 snuck to Texas.|
We had to stop every 3-4 hours to eat.
Meeting my grandmother.
Letting cousin Brody feed her. :)
my mini-me, Brooke, and me feeding our babies
all my Memaw's great grands together!
napping with Papaw
Our first Christmas together.
Meeting cousin, Bryce, who is 4 months older.
All but 1 of her great grand parents.
Me & my daughter on adoption day!!
Not thrilled about being back in Kansas in this freezing cold.
I give all praise and glory to God for answering my prayers and providing for all my needs all my days. This child is his and I'm honored to be given the responsibility of raising her into a ferocious woman of God.